Tuesday, 18 February 2020

" DEPARTURE" #1



It was a Friday and Zoya was pretty excited to go to school. The excitement was not about school but the departure that followed. Departure towards home. Home for her was her grandma. All she had to do was wake up, else her mother would shout at the top of her voice, no wonder the whole neighborhood knew her name! To protect her precious ears she got up.
She had practically to do nothing, all of her chores were done to her, as in, she was stripped, bathe, brushed, dried, dolled up with her plain blue uniform, which she always hated, her hair parted and tied into two perfect pony tails, her white socks and the worst was those dull boring black shoes which she dreaded. They made her feet smell and she did try to reason with her mother. She hated this, she hated that she couldn’t choose to keep her hair wild and free. She loved the way how her hair flew when she ran, like they were her personalized wings. The blue uniform gave her the blues, she adored baby pink.  It made her feel pretty.
She was wrapped up like a present ready for school and pushed to her spot light. The place where the bus picked her up. Before she reached her spot light, like an artist yet to perform she was showered with kisses. She never understood why people who loved her so much were ready to send her away and the worst MAKE HER WEAR THAT HIDEOUS UNIFORM.
But she was grown up and being wiser now, after all the fighting and the crying in vain, she had learnt who the boss of the house was, the hard way. It was always her mother, even though her father let her, have her way, he instantly jumped ships when he had to choose between her and mum. This made her angry. He always said she was his princess. Then how could he betray her?
All this forgotten as soon as she saw the face of her beloved friend and rushes towards the van, where her seat near the window had been reserved. After the short catch up with her friend, the loud singing at school, the boring alphabets, playing in the sand and just like that, another typical day at school was done.  
Like the first rains that arrives to quench the thirst of the dry soil, she rushed to shower everyone at home with her love. It was Friday eve, and this meant all was packed, all her favorite dresses and shoes in her beautiful pink bag. Like a bee, she rushed from car to home and home to car, untiringly verifying if all things are set perfect. She then got to remove that plain uniform with so much enthusiasm, such she felt like a mutiny was won. The joy was immense when she saw her darling dress waiting for her and rushed to wear it.
All was set for the journey, she occupied the back seat behind the captain’s place, that was her seat, made sure then don’t forget her. She had promised grandma to definitely arrive and she didn’t want to risk it. Her determination to go was, mightier than the Himalayas. While she was sitting determined here, the whole house was reshuffled for her, not unless her mother bellowed for her, that being how they found her.
As her father settled to take the wheel and mum beside him. She enthusiastically waved bye bye to her dogs, tiger and thunder, her house, her rose garden, her sugarcane plant now taller than her, waiting to ripen, and her kitchen set. She wondered how that got there. Then it struck her, she had played with it yesterday. Now she prayed hard that her mum doesn’t see it and promised she will remember to put it away as soon as she comes back.
She just wanted to escape now and if possible fly to her grandma that instant, but she had to wait for 5 hours. She knew not time but that’s what her mum told. That doesn’t mean she couldn’t enquire persistently about it till the destination was reached. She waved madly at people, saw the trees fly by, the sun paint his sky and was in immense need of candy, felt hungry, and the urgency to relieve herself. When her ship stopped for a break she rushed to mum and got her tummy emptied first and later filled.
The finishing touch was her candy, for her dad doesn’t share his candy. Candy with which he could blow clouds, she wanted to do that, but nada. In UKG now, she vowed one day she will. She got what she could, her candy, she then rushed to resume her seat and played the journey that was paused earlier.

Saturday, 25 January 2020

*COMFORT FOOD*


After a happening day at work during the journey homeward, you start contemplating is this all what your going do? Is this life to you? You are strained and drained. I suggest you don't just hug the bed. Instead listen to what I do and hopefully see my view.

On such days, I rush like a school girl in her early days, towards my own cocoon of comfort, I head. When I reach home its comfort food that’s decided. You see what comfort food a process of de-stress. Where you do what you do with such involvement that you forget the past and stop worrying about the future, you just live in the moment!

First I take attendance of all the ingredients present. I plant every step for efficient execution. I don't dilute this process with music, TV or talking to anyone at all. You see this is my space! I start simultaneously with boiling water and cutting veggies. You see Pasta and cranberry juice is my comfort food. Yes, you heard it right nothing like excess sugar and carbs to make a sad day better.

The pan is the stage where I make the veggie dance, till they are perfectly made!
The most important being the sauce, should be prepared in the same pan so that the essence is not lost. As I stir my sauce vigorously, I am at liberty to imagine my boss.
As all is over, you add the sauce, veggies and pasta and toss it together. I keep the flame low so that they don't go cold.

At that moment I rush to get refresh and excited return take a big bowl empty half pan and juice in other hand. I head towards my spot. My favourite spot between the TV and the window, the cozy chair with my blanket already there. I sit comfortably, and take the first bite and I relish the smoothness and crunchiness of the sauce and veggie along with the flavour of cranberries. Lost I am to the world.

With every other bit I take, my happiness awake, finished now, I fall on earth and break.
Sated I am. And remember all the calls to catch on and obligatory tales to perform.
I feel re-energize, ready to take on the world, now revived!

Listen here friends,
When you’re tired, exhausted, drained.
Don't just simply sit and blame.
Do something that ignites your flame!!!


Sunday, 19 January 2020

" ME"


Born on a windy day,
I love the way, she messes my hair
To watch birds fly
Their grace, the ease and oh so high.

Born on warm night,
I choose the anxious heat over calm cold,
The warm hugs rather a cold stare
And hot coffee over cold anytime.

Born at the end of summer,
I love mangoes, melons and the mesmerizing nights
Filled with laughter and mischief
As we cousins unite.

Born before rains, you see
I love to cuddle by the window sill
To gaze as the drops dance for the beat
Of lighting and thunder and I wonder.. Something warm would be nice.

There is no explanation to this,
Being born is eligible enough, I guess
A bookworm I am.
The seasons change, everything re-arrange,
But a book always remains.


Monday, 28 October 2019

What cut you the deepest, love?


What cut you the deepest, love?
The woe of being not daddy's princess
The screams of a silent mother
The chatter of constant abuse
Of being unwanted, unfelt and unloved
Failure or fear of failure
Assault of your trust
The lonely nights
The emptier days
The ungrateful ways
Being someone’s choice, while they your habit
Of being invisible, muted, suffocated
Helpless, helpless and helpless.
Pain is the sculptor, that chisels
So I ask
Love, What cut you the deepest?

Friday, 25 October 2019

**To the person who owns my heart**


I know, I would never suffice
An imaginary yard stick, nor measure
You, my love, are in love with a predecessor
Glimpse of her, you treasure
Search in every successor.
You try to fit the mold she left
At times with her crafty eyes
Others, with her bright light!
But in the end,
When you settle for the eyes, you missed the light
And the light never matches with the perfect eyes!!
On a crusade you went
A causality, I was never meant
Yet so spent..
I did try with kohl and charisma
With the stories you told.
But, something was amiss
The light glared my eyes.
Now wiser, I know
You set things free, you love
Doing so, I freed myself
From a mold I could never fill.
Now “capital investment" you became
My muse, to write poems and ever love
To I, I promise, not to try
To fit your mold, on another.